To all the ladies who are married to a man a few years older to them, raise your hands. Here’s a virtual high-five to all of you. Like me, do you feel lie you made the best decision of your life by marrying someone who’s a lot more experienced, and thus more mature, than you? If yes, you and I are on the same page.
I have no qualms in accepting the fact that before getting married, I dated a man who was the same age as me. Often, he and I would get into petty fights, our egos clashing to prove the other one wrong. This happens with most same-aged couples where both partners think they know better.
This of course is not a generalisation. I only speak from my own lived experience of realising that a little difference in age (5 years in my case) really helped my relationship. A partner who’s lived longer on this planet usually has experience, maturity, and doesn’t seem to get uptight over the smallest issues.
Here are five things I learnt from my wonderful marriage to an older man:
1. He knows how to calm me down when I fly off the handle
I am too impulsive by nature and at times lose my sanity over petty things. I love the way he knows how to calm me down without reacting to my outburst. The best part? He’s responsive, not reactive. I can trust him with my vulnerability without fretting over how it might be perceived. Older men know how to take control of a situation with their wisdom and have a constructive approach and perspective to things. More than anything else, he’s much calmer during tough times than I am.
2. He balances things out
I am chirpy, the mad crazy nut; he’s calmer, more reserved. I feel this balances it out for us and works in our favour. He’s the responsible to my carefree, providing me the much-needed stability every relationship needs. Also, he appreciates my point of view as much I do his, and that perhaps strike the perfect balance for us.
3. He is reliable
Nothing is better than knowing that no matter what, your partner will be there to help you tackle everything that may go wrong in your life. Every time you eff up, your partner is there to support you, and also serve as a sounding board for solutions.
4. His advice counts
This happens more in cases where you know your partner is way more mature and experienced than you. If you’re stuck with doubts and dilemmas, their words of wisdom always comes as a big help. He helps me figure out my priorities in life and sort life accordingly. He simplifies life, and makes love easy.
5. Oh! The chivalry needs a special mention
Admit it, ladies. Who doesn’t like a man full of etiquette and chivalry? When you are with a man who’s your age, you’re more like friends and honestly you don’t care much about him being the gentleman. My husband always makes me feel like a lady because he always treats me like one, and nothing beats that. Every little gesture of chivalry counts.
