I’d like to jump right into discussing why I prefer prioritising my career over my love life in my 20s. As the eclectic and beautiful Lady Gaga said, “Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you’re wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn’t love you anymore.”
I am 29, have had two relationships and have retired early, love wise. Sure it’ll induce giggles and maybe even some eye rolls, because I’m too young to retire from anything. But hey, I have my reasons. No, I’m not a bitter man-hater, nor have I given up on the idea of romance. It’s just that I’ve discovered that at this point in my life, the only thing that deserves the very best of me—dedication, effort and focus—is my career. Why? Well, simply because I found out that it is the only bankable thing to do in your late twenties, one you’re sure to get fruitful returns out of.
Loving and binding yourself to a romantic connection in your 20s is more often than not, messy. You’re still figuring out who you are as a person and then you become consumed by the need to understand the emotional intricacies of another human being. These years also awaken the curious cat in you, urging you to test the magical yet baffling waters of intimacy. It can be manageable for some, but it’s not for everyone, and that’s okay.
Most things we deal with in life demand a different version and approach out of us. And in this particular phase, I introspected about the demands that I paid attention to and the direction I was headed in. Where was I headed? What were my goals? What was the life I wanted for myself? I could only find these answers if I found my true calling, and pursued it.
Your 20s are a vulnerable time. If you fuse that with matters of the heart, and the complications they bring, the outcome could be one that’s not in your favour. Love is beautiful and wild, but requires tenacity and maturity if you want it to be more than just an exquisite waste of your time. At this stage, I am still finding out things about myself, and I know for sure that there’s still a long way to go.
For instance, I’ve realised that I can tolerate my potential partner calling me only once a day, but I’d simply refuse to approve of his political stance on the upcoming Lok Sabha elections. I know, the older, more evolved me, will know how to entertain a thought without having to accept it. I’ll know (or at least I hope I will), that just because we’re a couple, we won’t have to have the same likes, dislikes and opinions, and that we can agree to disagree.
When I do choose to focus on love, it will be more than just a distraction from my goals. For now, I choose to be in a relationship with my career. It’s teaching me the power of consistency, the value of integrity and the beauty of being able to make a living out of something I enjoy doing. Right now, that’s just about all I need to know – and all I can really handle.
Lead Image credit: YRF & Window Seat Films