Relationships require work–and we don’t just mean while you’re in it. Before you embark on one, you need to invest time to get to know your prospective partner; and after it’s done and dusted, you need to ensure you crumble from the weight of it all.
You see, getting over a breakup is not easy–it requires you to work on yourself. However, jumping into another relationship to get over the one before isn’t exactly the way to do it. In fact, it will just infuse toxicity into your life. We’ll tell you why:
For starters, once you take off from the relationship side of life, you undergo a huge change. A whole other person is suddenly not around, which means you’ve got to make some adjustments. During which you learn how to cope with a lot of things. Be it as tiny as stopping yourself from texting him when you pick up your phone to as big as not having that level of companionship with anyone. That’s the journey of self discovery—it’s sad but you need to do it. Because on your way, you’ll discover your quirks.
So, you’ve got to fully understand yourself, before you drag another prospective SO into your life. Because if you just jump into something new to escape the old, you’ll not only end up harming yourself, but this new XYZ as well. Nobody is perfect–but if you don’t know and process your imperfections, how will you ever evolve?
Secondly, and there’s no easy way to put it, jumping into a new relationship that quickly after a breakup, just means you’re on a rebound. We hate to break it to you, but you don’t actually like him THAT much. Yeah, he’s cute and yeah, he’s probably a great person–but you and him? There isn’t much there. You’re just looking to fill the gaping hole in your heart. So, quit playing with his heart. Take some time off, relax, and be single. Hook up with three different men in one night if you want to–we’re not judging. But stay off the relationship wagon please.
Lastly, don’t be so scared to find out who you really are–without that arm candy. It’s okay to be alone. It doesn’t translate into being alone forever. Breathe, and be a 100% true to yourself. Once you’re fully comfortable with being single and accept yourself for who you are–that’s when the time will be right for you to fall in love with someone else again.
