All thanks to overworked marketing and advertising folks in the world, we’ve managed to transform Valentine’s day into an entire month of hearts, roses and candy. The pressure to have a date on V-day is even more unrelenting in the age of dating apps and social media. Unfortunately, not all of us are ready to jump onto the committed lane. And no, we’ve not gone completely insane!
As Valentine’s day approaches, newer strategies to remind us of our singlehood are being implemented. If it was just encountering decoration at malls, it would be different. Now, it’s text messages from your service provider, ads on Spotify, and even pop-ups on your OTT platforms. Even our parents, who on most occasions have a meltdown at the mention of dating, seem to be asking us about our dating lives. Where do we get some peace?
If I have accurately described your mental state this February, here’s a guide to navigating those nosy questions about your “plans” this Valentine’s Day.
1. “Plans? I don’t even have a PLA–”
Go the Phoebe Buffet way and just let them know about your utter disinterest.
Credit: Giphy/Friends
2. “Why do I need Valentine’s Day plans if I’ve got the best company? Me, myself and I.”
Narcissism usually shuts people up.
Credit: Giphy/TheMindyKalingProject
3. “If you need me, I’ll be in my pajamas, watching shows with a glass of wine.”
When will self love be deemed worthy of pursuit on V-day because I need some. Don’t you?
Credit: Giphy/YoungerTV
4. “Wow, how disappointing was that question?”
In confusion, always look to Queen Rihanna for answers.
Credit: Giphy/ABCNetwork
5. “Was that question supposed to make me feel something?”
Like Lorde once said, question their very intentions.
Credit: Giphy/Billboard Music Awards
6. “What are YOUR plans for Valentine’s day? How does YOUR love life look like right now? Who are you dating? Are you in love?”
Just freeze them out with questions about their life and watch them crumble.
Credit: Giphy/SaturdayNight Live
7. “If you don’t love the way my love life looks, then stop looking at it!”
Either way, Jennifer Aniston’s reply to a reporter is always going to be badass.
Credit: Giphy/Friends
Lead image credit: Red Chillies Entertainment + Balaji Motion Pictures