Online dating can be quite a challenge to undertake voluntarily. Anyone who’s been on any of the apps can vouch for the kind of weirdos you come across. It doesn’t matter what you are looking for–could range from a relationship to a casual fling, because these randoms will find a way to make you want nothing in the end. What a great power to have!
There are might be a few you swiped right for, who turned out annoying AF. But more often that not, it’s the hot ones that disappoint the most. You have these expectations of starting your next glorious one-in-a-million soulmate escapade, but he turns out to be the one sending you generic forwards with a buttload of heart emojis. Damn pissing off right?
If you are on any one of these dating platforms and have even one hot picture of yourself on there–you can brace yourself for the flurry of messages you are. Wondering what kind of response you’re going to get? Well, learn from our experience and read through as we share the 6 types of dating profile you’re bound to bump into.
1. The profesh one
Imagine Hrithik Roshan from Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. Not as good-looking, not as rich, or living in London–but just his job description or where he’s studied is probably a turn on in itself. The pictures are okay, but his bio has that perfect flavour of grammar that you’ve been thirstily craving for a while. Yummy! Don’t give us that look–we’ve all swiped right at an Oxford degree. After all, pure intellect is a hard-find in today’s world of serial creeps. Logic enough? Moving on.
2. The ‘gym is life’ guy
There are a bunch of them. So many, actually, that someone needs to come up with a separate app for them to collectively be on and show off their abs, biceps, triceps and other body parts. The weird part is, it’s not just one picture–it’s all six of them in different areas of the gym, just flexing muscles or doing hard-core exercise. We get it: you work out, you have abs! Now go home because your bio also reads ‘gym freak’, like we didn’t get it the first six times.
3. Artsy AF
This guy has done a PhD in clicking the coolest pictures that will confuse the heck out of you. You’ll probably go through the profile five times to make sure that you can actually understand what this person even looks like. But the one thing you can be certain of is that this boy has piqued your interest and you know it. There’s just something about guys who know how to click good pictures of themselves, isn’t it?
4. The time traveller
We get it: you’ve travelled the world and seen it all. We can’t be there with you, but your profile isn’t going to help either, so calm down. The vistas are scenic, but his face is always turned away from the camera–so even though you know that perhaps he’s well to do, you’re not sure if the face matches the scenery.
5. The hot fuckboi
You know this one is going to come hopping in your wildest dreams. He’s hot, has the jawline of a Greek god, and dresses like a rich south Delhi boy–all the ingredients of a great catch but with a heart of stone. You’ll fall in lust faster than you’ll fall in love, and that’s honestly the best part!
6. The shady overload
There is always this one guy who always wears sunglasses. All of his pictures are hot-ish but again, the confusion is real when it comes to figuring out whether he’s actually hot or not. Maybe he’s just good from far, but far from good? This one is going to be one of those profiles you have to really scrutinize before you swipe right. But once you do, the ‘shady’ might be a compliment.
