Breakup sex is that bittersweet, passionate last ride you take with a person whom you’ve just broken up with or are about to.
In my opinion, this journey is way better than the one called make-up sex where people celebrate the triumph of their love after a major fallout. The forbidden fruit of “goodbye” sex is enhanced by the feeling of that last touch, the last sexual gratification. And as Ted Spiker said, “It’s like the day before a diet. Tomorrow I’ll start, but today I’m going to enjoy one last order of chicken wings.”
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Even though it is considered a slippery slope knowing well that several unpleasant factors are behind the breakup and feelings of having parted are still fresh. However, the act of indulging in sex with a former partner without any strings attached gives it the wild touch each person craves under the sheets.
1. Breakup sex is the last hurray before you move on
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Everyone has their own share of grievances from relationships that didn’t work out. Yet, research by sex therapists has shown that breakup sex is a great way to celebrate everything good in a relationship and to find closure before moving onto someone else.
2. Breakup sex is all about ‘getting under them to get over them’
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As raw as that emotion might sound, it is actually a great way of letting out all the pent up emotions in the form of mutual “exercise”. Breakup sex will put to rest all the drunk texts to your ex, late-night ‘I miss you’ calls, and feeling horny and always thinking of them. This kind of sex which has a particular intention behind it, helps both people involved get closure by providing a peaceful resolution to the turmoil. Psychologically, ‘it confirms that this phase of each other’s lives has ended, and thus it’s time to move on.’
3. This ‘cheating on your diet’ kind of sex is actually a great stress-reliever
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It is not easy to let go of a romance you once enjoyed, despite its ups and downs. The stress stemming from the separation is real. If you dig a little into psychology, you’ll read about something called ‘arousal transfer’. Simply put it is the conscious shift in your emotional state from being angry to extremely horny by having sex during the time of conflict. As is commonly known, a chemical called Oxytocin is released during sex which acts as a natural painkiller—which will ensure you automatically feel your stress levels and anxiety going down.
4. The excitement is unmatched and the release too
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Just knowing you don’t have to care about this one person anymore and the terminal nature of your equation with them will help you let loose. Without any inhibitions and constraints, the breakup sex will deliver you some wild, wild satisfaction without worrying about the after-effects. The total lack of constraint is what makes breakup sex usually more exciting than sex in a relationship and even make-up sex.
5. This will help you put the negative memories to rest
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First off, no one will be addressing bad feelings and experiences during sex—so you’re saved from that drama. Two, according to a study by The University of Cambridge, positive memories of an experience can create a reduced vulnerability to depression. Hence, fighting off those bad memories by putting them to rest with that last moment of reconciliation before walking your own paths can potentially help you to have positive memories of the relationship. The last thing you’ll remember of that relationship is probably a mind-blowing orgasm so it is a win-win.
While not all breakups can handle that one last sexual gratification, but all those who can, must try this at least once!
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And even though people may point out several problems with this kind of sex, I can only think of one major concern (or advantage) of breakup sex–if it is so good, it generates second thoughts about the breakup.
Lead: Jab We Met/Imtiaz Ali
