I’ve been obsessed by my weight ever since my early teens, when the stubborn puppy fat refused to melt away. I resorted to the odd crash diet, but was never really disciplined enough to lose any weight. Frankly I was always hungry and I loved my food, so much so that I would steal my sister’s food from her plate when she wasn’t looking. She was the skinny one and I was the one who “loved her food”. I hated that.
Having avoided sports at any cost while at school, I eventually discovered the gym when I started working, and eventually managed to get a body that I was generally OK with.
Now, in my mid-40s, while I’m no gym bunny, I’m a regular at bikram yoga classes, I occasionally visit the gym and swim, and I’m not in bad shape. Despite that, and despite having had two children, I still spend an inordinate amount of my time obsessing about the fact that I’m not skinny, even when people compliment me on my toned arms and healthy looking body.
I know, if I look at myself objectively, that I look pretty good for an almost 45 year old. Why then, do I beat myself up in this way?
The pressure on women to look perfectly proportioned, to bounce back into shape after having babies and to cling on to those youthful, slim bodies is immense. What noone takes into account though is that as life goes on, it becomes harder and harder to stop the pounds creeping on. The metabolism slows, the baby weight clings, and it is way harder to get the needle on the scale to move down. But the point is, who cares? There are plenty of fat old men out there, most of whom I meet in the park taking their evening perambulations, but noone questions them or smirks at their wobbly paunches and double chins. Unfortunately, it’s a man’s world when it comes to letting it all hang out.
We are smart, educated women. We are confident when it comes to running our households and handling our kids and husbands. We need to stop this obsession with being thin, and focus on being healthy instead of being skinny. And if that seems like an impossible task, here is a list of reasons why being fit, healthy and maybe curvy is way better than being a Skinny Minnie …
1. Whether we are married, in a long or short term relationship, or single, we are women with history far more interesting than the twenty-somethings with their pert behinds and miniscule waists.
2. Exercise actually makes you bigger not smaller – building muscle rather than making you shrink. This is a good thing. Big toned bodies are way better than skinny, unfit frames.
3. Thin people are often very unhealthy. See that chain smoker? She’s as thin as a rake, but her lungs are not so great looking.
4. A little fat on the face helps to plump the lines out, keeping you looking younger longer. Healthy or haggard looking – you choose.
5. Eating is good. Food gives you energy. Energy helps you be successful at whatever you put your mind to. Just ensure that most of what you put in your mouth is healthy, and you’ll conquer the world.
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