Sanya Malhotra became a household name after delivering an extraordinary performance as wrestler Babita Kumar in sports drama Dangal. Ever since, the actor has delivered several acclaimed performances.
In her latest interview, she revealed that these performances were a result of a maddening pressure to not make a single misstep. The 29-year old actor revealed that she has always been too hard on herself until she realised that she can not control everything. So, what changed for her?
Image credit: Instagram/sanyamalhotra_
Malhotra reveals how striving for perfection took a toll on her
After a series of headline-making performances in films like Pagglait, Pataakha and Badhaai Ho, we’re assured that Malhotra is bursting with talent and potential. Therefore, some of us might find the use of words like ‘self doubt’ ‘pressure‘ and ‘Sanya Malhotra’ in the same sentence misplaced. But that’s the thing with negative thoughts, they don’t see how good you are before creeping in.
In an interview with PTI, Malhotra said, “Earlier, I was too harsh on myself as an actor. I would get mad at myself for making mistakes, which was definitely not helping me with anything. I was harsh on myself because maybe I was still trying to learn about so many things, about the industry, the job. Even a small mistake used to tick me off. I was trying to be perfect in everything.”
Image credit: Instagram/sanyamalhotra_
The Meenakshi Sundareshwar actor further revealed that she cried herself to sleep every time her film released: “Whenever a film used to come out, I would not listen to anyone and first give myself a report, ‘I didn’t do this well’, so that if next time I got an opportunity like that, I should work harder. After every release, I would go back home and cry myself to sleep. My family has seen it so much.”
“There was a lot of pressure from my end to not let go of a film like Dangal”
Malhotra explained that the pressure mounted since her first film itself was headlined by megastar Aamir Khan. So, that left no room for mistakes.
She said, “It was the pressure that I had put on myself during my first film. I thought if I was getting this opportunity, then I have to be perfect. In Dangal, I had one minute of wrestling, but I prepared for 10 months. Not that I had an option, but there was a lot of pressure from my end to not let go of a film like Dangal.”
Image credit: Aamir Khan productions
“That was my conditioning as an actor and that stayed with me. Then the second film happened, then the third followed. There was a lot of unnecessary pressure I was putting myself through, which I realised wasn’t worth it,” the actor said.
In 2020, all promotional interviews and events happened virtually thanks to the pandemic. The “inherently shy” Malhotra said the opportunity helped ease her into the pre-release anxiety she was used to facing.
How Malhotra learnt to not make every film release a dreadful experience
Malhotra said she started realising she could not control the audience’s reactions at the time of her first digital outing Shakuntala Devi.
“The release week makes you anxious, at the top of it when you are promoting a film, it is like putting yourself in the middle of anxiety. I was with my family that time and they could all see I was going crazy because the film was coming out. But then I started working on not being too anxious regarding the film’s reception,” she said.
Image credit: Instagram/sanyamalhotra_
“I was happy with my work. I learnt that the only thing I could control was my reaction to the work I am doing. Apart from that, nothing was in my control. That realisation happened then. That helped me later when Ludo released because I was completely relaxed. Now, I make sure I am celebrating the release and not making it a big deal, a dreadful experience,” she said.
Malhotra further revealed that she finally found herself in a “good space” after the release of her films, Pagglait and Meenakshi Sundareshwar.
Recently, she also announced that she will be reuniting with her Dangal co-star, Fatima Sana Shaikh, for Meghna Gulzar directorial Sam Bahadur.
Lead image credit: Netflix, Instagram/sanyamalhotra_
