Unlike women, who are usually very expressive about the way they think and feel, men are not very vocal about their emotions, especially the melancholic ones. Men perceive themselves to have a strong hold over such feelings of weakness, and often try to mask or ignore than accept them. When such emotions go unrecognised and uncared for, for a long time, it can lead to depression.
Today depression is a serious mental disorder, which affects millions of people without being limited to a gender or race. It does not only affect a single person’s health, it can disrupt their relationship and career too. And that is why, as a spouse or as someone who cares, you should be able to tell if he’s in a bad mood or it’s more serious. Spotting the signs can make you take the right precautionary measures.
1. He has lost interest in the things he once enjoyed: You know he’s an ardent football fan, but now he rarely watches matches, and even if he does you can see he’s not really interested. Maybe his favourite team is losing, but if you notice the same lack of interest with other things he once enjoyed, you need to take it seriously.
2. There’s an obvious lack of energy: If he wants to just stay back home on a Sunday and do nothing, you can’t go around pointing fingers. However, if you see him struggling with everyday things like not stepping out of his pajamas every other weekend, staying in bed all the time, not showering and refusing to do anything that needs that extra effort, it could be a signs he’s depressed.
3. He suffers from unreasonable physical pain: Depression in men sometimes shows up as physical symptoms. Sudden bouts of backache, digestive disorders, headaches and other pains often show up randomly and frequently without any reasonable explanations. Usually they don’t even respond to normal treatment. Don’t just hand him a pill, but pay attention to how often he’s been complaining.
4. His appetite has become strange: Men are very particular about their food. Either they love it too much or are too careful about what they eat in order to keep up those muscles and abs. If there’s a prolonged change in their eating behaviour, it could be a warning sign. Keep his favourite food in front of him, if he shows disinterest or just walks away, you know there’s something wrong.
5. His confidence levels have taken a dip: Depression can distort the way people think and feel. Most men show pride and confidence in the things they do, even simple things like fixing a bulb. If you notice a dip in these levels of confidence or notice any sort of insecure behaviour that just seems strange, don’t ignore it.
6. He no longer enjoys sex: How can one want to have sex when they’re constantly feeling this deep void inside them. Depression affects ones mood and hormones, causing lack of libido or even sexual dysfunction.
7. His behaviour is getting reckless: Men are more likely to find ways to escape this gloomy feeling. They will be drawn to activities like dangerous sports, reckless driving, gambling etc that pump up their adrenaline and ego even if it puts their life and well-being at risk.
8. He’s finding unreasonable ways and excuses to self-medicate: Alcohol and drugs often find people when they’re at their lowest. The ‘high’ always seems to make depression go away for a little time. If he’s using these means to feel better, it may be a big warning sign.
9. He’s easily irritable: It’s not just a one-day-thing, does he seems moody and irritable on most days? Sometimes this can lead to anger and violence too. Maybe he didn’t mean to say or do things, but it’s the disorder that’s controlling his moves now.
10. He has developed unusual sleep patterns: He’s either sleeping too much or too little. And it’s not just temporary, you’ve noticed this change for a long time and you can tell for sure that something’s wrong. Brace that sixth sense woman, something may really be wrong!
While a single sign or two may not really indicate it’s depression, if he begins to check positive for more than half of these symptoms, it’s time to get serious about it. Save him and your relationship from this mental trauma, here’s How to Help Your Partner Cope with Depression.
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