The white, round plate, with its regular upturned edges, deep centre, and easy to navigate crevices, is becoming a myth. This is because it is not cool anymore, like thin eyebrows. A restaurant is no longer ranked based on how good the food is, no. Now, it’s all about how avant garde their plates are. The less it looks like a plate, the better.
While it might have started with trying to keep tableware rustic, with mason jars and casseroles, it has reached a level of “wtf” no one was prepared for! From serving food in prison-style “distressed” enamelware, to using urinal-shaped bowls, the world has lost its mind. In an attempt to be different, and be a hipster, we have all taken it too far and made plating ridiculous.
Plates are too mainstream, so they chopped up a block of wood to put cake on.
Why eat from a regular plate like regular people, when you can eat from an old, rusty box?
It’s simply not artistic to put a plate beneath your food, and then put it on a tray, when you can just dirty the tray itself.
Want to scoop up gravy? Too bad, because the piece of stone you will get your food on has no edges!
Who cares that a wooden chopping board isn’t washable in the long run and difficult to handle, as long as we have what we need for our Instagram?
Food tastes better when served inside a kiosk. Not.
In fact, there is an entire Twitter handle, called @wewantplates, dedicated to just compiling a list of all the ridiculous items that have been masquerading as tableware. Here, we list some gems.
Yeah. That’s dessert on a sanitary towel.
Read more as @illicit_empress visits Japan’s Alcatraz: https://t.co/W8wdxXvJbC pic.twitter.com/nxKCF6vRBx
— We Want Plates (@WeWantPlates) December 20, 2016
When your dessert arrives on a plank while you’ve gone to the toilet and the ice cream makes a break for freedom.
(Pic: @joe_petch) pic.twitter.com/8wJviORZKl— We Want Plates (@WeWantPlates) December 14, 2016
A valiant yet fruitless attempt to disguise the embarrassment of eating dessert from a tiny bath
(Pic: @MsDarlizzle) pic.twitter.com/oh0eKRwcwk— We Want Plates (@WeWantPlates) August 15, 2016
CHEFS! Stop food sliding onto tables by serving it on non-slip industrial flooring.
Or plates.
(Pic: Rob Wyborn) pic.twitter.com/VQTsJBksZr
— We Want Plates (@WeWantPlates) August 5, 2016
Tempura and soup in stilettos. Croquetas in trainers. Flipflop desserts. Squid in clogs.
STOP THIS SHOE MADNESS. pic.twitter.com/OE5fytawRe
— We Want Plates (@WeWantPlates) May 30, 2016
Because why wouldn’t you want onion rings hanging on salvage from the restaurant’s bathroom refit? (Pic: @FSekeleni) pic.twitter.com/mDk4ip87aH
— We Want Plates (@WeWantPlates) December 6, 2015