These days 80 per cent of the conversation at parties begin with, ‘Dude I need to lose some weight.’ From the skinniest to the healthiest, everyone nods their heads and out comes a brigade of diet must-dos, dieticians must-try and sweets must-avoids. Me, I just yawn and get back to eating my cheesy pasta. Not because I have pulled a Kareena and am a size zero, but because I don’t care. I really DON’T!
For the longest of time I did though. Each time I would go out I had a mini panic attack, going through my closet trying to find a tent-like dress that would a Fit, b Hide the fat, c Let me breathe and so on. The A-line cuts and long, long kurtis became my best friend. And why not! If you are fat and go shopping in India, the first thing the shopkeeper will pull out, after silently judging your plus size, is kurtis. It’s like you lose the right to be fashionable if you are fat.
Not to forget the concern you get from every relative, friend and foe on earth. ‘What happened beta? Do you have thyroid problem?’ being the most famous one I’ve heard so far. They will try and hook you up with every fat-doctor they know and also slip it random comments and example along the way. The ‘You know Sharma aunty lost 10 kilos by standing on one leg and drinking hot water,’ kinds which makes you want to ask them, ‘What happened aunty? Do you have brain problem?’
And if you manage to dodge all of those there are the not-so-subtle staring, pointing and laughing. You’ll often hear people burst out into laughter the moment you are out of the room. You suddenly become the fat-joke ambassador and ‘moti’ becomes the universal nickname for you.
So what did I do to escape all this? I escaped myself. Not the best decision in hindsight; all those lonely nights tucked away with rom-coms, just makes you want to drown your sorrow in more ice-cream. So not cool!
However that was then. Thankfully!
Today I am unapologetically happy with my plus sized figure. I don’t care about the stares and the jokes and I’ve thrown away the fat-kurtis. I wear what I like and while there are days when I do bring out the tents again, those are normally called Mondays, so #acceptable.
I’ve grown to love my size, not wanting to lose weigh just because society expects me to. I love myself, all the fat layers including, and while I do make new resolutions every week to go to the gym and not eat cheese, I don’t beat myself up over not following them. I do things my way, I wear what I like and if I do find someone making a fat joke on me, I make one too and we both just laugh it off.
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