2020 has been a scary year. From climate change and socio-political crises across the world, to the outbreak of a pandemic that has changed the world irreversibly, this year took a toll on us in more ways than one.
Yet, there are people who are feeling bad about not “going the extra mile” and not ticking off items off a checklist of goals for this year. Isn’t that wild, given the fact that we are lucky to even be alive right now? If you’re someone who is being chided for not meeting their goals by parents, or feels low for not achieving more, please know some things.
Image credits: photo by the United Nations COVID-19 Response on Unsplash
Think about how much our living situation changed due to COVID, and how it affected us
We all know that stressing about health was the main reason 2020 was so mentally exhausting. But this pandemic also created stressors in other aspects of life which drained us.
Our living situation changed during the lockdown. Some of us were stuck alone without our families, worried sick about our loved ones and without anyone to take care of us. Others were bound inside with abusive partners. So many parents struggled with work due to having to take care of children at home all day. Many were re-adjusting to life with family members we hadn’t seen in a while. Some didn’t even have a place to stay!
Image credits: Photo By Alex Iby on Unsplash
Very few people had it easy in this respect and experienced smooth-sailing. When one’s home is a troubled place, where is the time for thinking about goals and things to do?
I stayed in for most of the year and did nothing but work in order to keep my job in an uncertain economic scenario. Sue me.
Image credits: Photo by Engin Akyurt on Unsplash
2020 was a year when businesses shut down, companies laid people off, and most couldn’t go to work for a large part of the year. As a result, living in fear of losing one’s job is something many people experienced. This is a mentally-taxing place to be in, because it causes a dissolution of boundaries between the workplace and the home. The chaos that ensues is not pleasant.
For many, working from home meant getting work calls late at night, working on weekends, and losing one’s sense of peace. The pressure to perform better at work made this worse. On the whole, 2020 saw people being more overworked than ever, leaving no time for anything else.
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Who has time for hobbies and other pastimes when one’s life and career is at stake? It’s quite easy for financially secure people to say that quitting a job in pursuit of idealistic goals is the right thing to do. But, for many, this means losing one’s livelihood. Not everyone has the money to backpack through Europe in search of oneself, or drop ten dress sizes during such a time.
You cannot focus on losing weight like a celebrity or influencer when you have a billion other things to do
Things like having time or a place to exercise are a privilege many don’t have. Taking breaks during work to eat macrobiotic meals every two hours is a privilege many don’t have. Managing to work on a salad a day is a privilege many don’t have. Expecting someone to lose weight while it is clear that our goal as humans should be things other than size, is ridiculous. Yet, there are people who expect us to make that a priority during a pandemic.
“But you had so much free time. What did you do?” are the words of someone who really doesn’t understand that working from home is still working
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Many people who didn’t have to work during the pandemic did have free time to do new things like make Dalgona coffee and bake bread. But a good many did not. Understanding the fact that a lockdown due to a pandemic is different from a holiday, is key here.
Those of us who did not have full-time housekeepers and cooks working for us had to do domestic work and office work, while also spending a large part of the day washing and sanitising groceries. We were not sitting on a beach and chilling. Excuse us for not having the time to prepare for the civil service exams, Uncle.
I don’t have the bandwidth for pursuing my passions at the moment, as I have bills to pay
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We all have things we think we will do when we don’t have the pressure of a full-time job. Some people want to make vlogs, some want to be photographers, while some want to learn a language. Is a pandemic the time and place for doing this stuff in? Maybe for some. But for most, it isn’t, and that is OKAY. This wasn’t a year where humankind got to live life to the fullest. It was a year where we pushed for survival. The important thing is that we made it so far.
The lesson here is that you don’t have to be motivated to do new things or force yourself to feel upbeat when the situation is dire. You don’t have to perform at an extraordinary level given the fact that nearly everyone in the world is struggling right now. If you push yourself too hard, it will only create more anxiety and make you feel like you’re falling behind.
Panic is an exhausting condition to live in, and it doesn’t leave much room for goal-attainment in the brain
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The stress of catching a deadly virus can actually exhaust you mentally. Even if something bad hasn’t happened to me yet, there’s a good chance that it might, given the state of the world everything that is going on, COVID not being the only problem. So it’s not wrong of me to worry about that without even trying. One look at the news and it’s hard not to sink into a pessimistic, stressful zone.
So, adding a million things to do to one’s schedule can also reduce the amount of time we spend resting, winding down, and easing out of anxiety-inducing situations. When we do this continuously and keep pushing, it can lead to a burn out. We can’t beat ourselves up for not peaking during a pandemic. The whole world has come to a standstill and suffered, and we can’t deny the fact that we have been affected as well. It’s okay to accept that.
Lead image credits: Nadiadwala Grandson Entertainment
