Much before Sima Taparia aka Sima Aunty from the Indian Matchmaking show cracked us up with her unintentional comedy, it was the matrimonial section of Indian newspapers that did the job. Credit poor grammar, limited space and characters, and the irrational demands that make no sense in the real world. Well, whether you’re getting married anytime soon or not, you cannot miss out on this dose of humour. Here’s a list of the funniest matrimonial ads from Indian newspapers, that left us rolling on the floor.
1. ‘Innocent divorcees’ apply only
We don’t even know what an innocent divorcee means, do you? Also, they want the girl to be ‘issueless’! Okay? Okay!
2. A no-entry board for feminists
Feminists don’t fit the eligibility criteria. Nobody wants a strong-headed and opinionated woman to shatter centuries-old patriarchy. It also demands the girl to be attractive and have high aspirations in life, but should be strictly below 26 years of age. Our reaction to that–Chahte kya ho?
3. Virgin girls only!
Nuff said! Virginity ko Swiss bank mein lock kar de?
4. Wholesale order of brides
Bwahaha! Well, this ad seems more like a wholesale order for brides.
5. No no to social media!
Expecting the girl to not be on Facebook? Instagram or Snapchat chalega kya?
6. Engineers most eligible, NOT!
Just when we thought that engineers are in great demand and the most eligible bachelors, we have been proven wrong!
7. Non-veg daughter? Haw!
We are literally rolling on the floor while reading this. We know he meant his daughter is a non-vegetarian, but this is too funny.
8. A true Hindu wanted, not religious but knowledgeable
Knowledge is everything. After all, Padhega India tabhi toh aage badhega India!
9. H1-Visas no bar
LOL! Because H1-Visas are too mainstream.
Lead Image Credit: Indian Matchmaking